I tried to reach out for help. But I can’t attract any ears to listen. Helpless, I turned back to WordPress.
I been having this weird kind of depression. The illness I bear with me. I figured out that I’m not strong enough to face any rejection even in the most unlikely situations. The reason why I hate being attached to anyone is,in the very first place I hate being left behind.
I hate one day, when I opened up and showed my real colours, people will get annoyed and be gone. I’m afraid if I’m too good with people, they will stabbed me at the back, and hurt me.
I had experience everything I mentioned above. Those friendships or relationship were fake. People come, People go. I just look down at myself, questioning where did I go wrong?
If I am a pleaser, try to please everyone, that is being unfair to myself. I had done that too, but the pain was too unbearable. I can’t take it.
Dear people, I wanna apologize if I suddenly disconnected myself from your life. I can’t help it. The urge to withdraw from any close relationship is too repulsive. Irresistible.
Sorry for all the misbehaves. Be good. Take care